You Know It's Time to Get Off Your Butt and Hit the Gym When...

. . . all of a sudden the person sitting beside you turns to you and say, "Wow, bulubundukin!"
Worse, said person begins counting:
"One mountain!" pointing to your bilbil.
"Two mountains!" this time to your tiyan.
"Three mountains! Four mountains!" to your boobs.
And the finale: "Five! Five mountains, bwahahaha!"


. . . you become paranoid that the labandera is out to get you because while she shrunk all your clothes, the rest of your family has no complaints at all.


. . . you contemplate undergoing a breast augmentation operation to help you walk (because having bigger boobs will counterbalance your arse).


. . . even during rush hour, you never have to stand in a train car because men and women alike keep on giving up their seats for you, thinking you were pregnant.


. . . passing by beauty clinics become a trial for you because the assistants insist on handing you with flyers, trying to convince you to try the latest rage to lose unwanted pounds.


[Disclaimer: This is a work in fiction and all characters herein are fictitious. Any resemblance to real persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.]

(Pero, sinong naka-relate?)

He Said, I Heard

I was horribly, horribly late for a meeting, which was already in full swing when I entered the conference hall.

Pero s’yempre, the first thing (or person) I looked for the in the conference hall was, of course, him.

This is the point where my story begins ...

* * *

He said:
O, K, dito ka na umupo sa tabi ni Lady Lawyer
(giving up his seat for me and grabbing another chair for himself).

I heard:
O, K, kami ni LL? Friends lang kami kahit na sabay kami pumunta dito sa meeting straight from the office. Officemates kasi kami.

* * *

Pastor 1:
K, sa Court of Appeals ka pa rin ba nagt-trabaho?

K:
Opo. Bibigyan na nga po nila ako ng medal dun e. Loyalty awardee.

He said:
Baka gusto mong mag-apply sa amin?

I heard:
Sa ‘min ka na mag-trabaho para magkita tayo araw-araw.


* * *


LL:
Sa Balintawak ka pa rin ba nakatira?

K:
Hindi na, lumipat na kami malapit sa Trinoma.

He said:
Gano’n ba? Akala ko kasi sa Sta. Maria ka umuuwi, dadaanan ka sana namin ni LL para sabay-sabay na sana tayo pumunta dito sa meeting.

I heard:
Sana pala nagpasundo ka na para alam ko na kung saan kita dadalawin.


* * *


He said:
O, pano ka uuwi?

I heard:
Gusto mo ba ihatid na kita pauwi?

Walang kokontra hanggang libreng mangarap :)

So, ano nang balita sa inyo?